Wednesday, January 06, 2010

An Aught Time in the Old Town Tonight

The days of 2009 are dwindling down to a precious few. At first glance moving into 2010 means at least one truly excellent thing. Those novelty eyeglasses sold each New Year’s Eve with the double zeros acting as the lenses will no longer be around. Another good thing is there was no Prince (or The Artist Formerly Known as Relevant to the Pop Music Scene) song asking us to party like it was 2009.

Remember back ten years ago when we were waiting for all the computers to go haywire, the phone systems to stop working, the internet to stop in its tracks, and nuclear power plants to meltdown. Then as the clock ticked past midnight we all held our collective breath as absolutely nothing remarkable happened. That is pretty much how I see New Year’s Eve every year. Millions of people gather for parties and hoopla whether it be in homes throughout the world, hotels and nightclubs with music and dancing, or in Times Square with public drunkenness and the ensuing public “becoming unwell” on other people’s shoes in order to watch the clock go from 11:59 to 12:00. Since my clocks do that a lot I fail to see the reason for all that effort. I will most likely be in bed before the clock goes from 9:59 to 10:00.

I am not entirely unsentimental about the ending of the calendar year. I don’t mind waxing a bit nostalgic and taking a look back at the year that was 2009.

January saw the United States of America make history on inauguration day. No it wasn’t the obvious thing – having the first African-American sworn in as President. We officially started a new political era. One in which the Republicans and the Democrats behave in such a manner they make the Hatfields and the McCoys appear circumspect and reasonable, the Montagues and the Capulets seem positively chummy, and Red Sox and Yankee fans give the impression of being blood brothers to the very end. The two political parties have never seen eye-to-eye on all things, but they now seem to base their decisions on what would annoy the other side more than what makes sense for the electorate. Why don’t we just have Pelosi & Reid and Boehner & McConnell suit up for a rousing match of Rollerball to determine health care plans for the nation? (Admit it. You’d love to see old, rich, white people strap on roller skates and leather gloves adorned with flesh ripping spikes duke it out for political supremacy.) The ticket of Jett Li and Ray Lewis would win in a landslide if Rollerball became the way disputes were settled politically.

Stepping away from the world of politics (mainly because it is too depressing to keep thinking about) we look back on the year in pop culture. A forty-eight year old nobody from Scotland captured the world’s heart and became an internet sensation. Susan Boyle is now world famous and probably quite rich. It just goes to show you you don’t have to have the looks of a Britney Spears to become a recording star. It also shows you that Simon Cowell has more power than any one man should have, especially a grumpy man who seems to be devoid of talent himself.

The top grossing movies of 2009 show commerce and art can go hand in hand. The commerce of teenage boys buying movies tickets and the art of keeping just enough clothing on Megan Fox to avoid getting a rating which would keep teenage boys from getting into the theater worked very well this year. It was also proven once again the movie going public wants films which ennoble mankind and show the high moral ground people of the 21st century so frequently aim towards. This was shown by the high income for a film portraying how men bonding together in ritualistic manners are men to be revered, men to emulated, and men to be signed for a sequel because The Hangover made boatloads of money and that really is all they care about in Hollywood after all.

In 2009 the Pittsburgh Steelers won their sixth Super Bowl and the New York Yankees won their twenty-seventh World Series. In the year 2009 fans of the Kansas City Chiefs and the Kansas City Royals surprised many in the sporting world by admitting they were fans of the Kansas City Chiefs and the Kansas City Royals…in public…without shame.

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