The right brain is the right brain

Working in the field of education means frequently I have to learn stuff. Yeah, I know, bummer. This week I was given four books by my bosses which I’m supposed to read over the summer. I guess this means I won’t be reading that private eye thriller as I relax by the pool. Actually, relaxing by the pool is not something I do, which is of benefit to anyone else wishing to relax by the pool. Let’s just say I would never be mistaken for Orlando Bloom.
One book is titled “Building Leadership Capacity in Schools”. I am voting this one most likely to make we consider claiming temporary blindness. The best glimmer of hope is the author’s name: Linda Lambert. That is a classic comic book name. By day she is mild-mannered education expert, Linda Lambert, but at night she becomes Wonder Teacher Lady. Completely unafraid of story problems, able to divide fractions in her head, and armed with only two super sharp No. 2 pencils, she strikes fear into all ill-informed ignorance mongers. Maybe not.
The second one is “The Five Dysfunctions of Team”. At first I thought it was going to be about the Kansas City Royals post-1989, but I found out otherwise. This book presents itself as a leadership fable. The idea is a corporation (let’s say Exxon) is something like that dog carrying a bone who peers into a pond (the outer continental shelf) and sees what he believes to be another dog holding another bone (more oil). The dog is jealous so he jumps into the pond dropping his own bone. The dog is able to find more bones in the pond (offshore oil) but it makes no difference in the price of dog food for at least twelve years. I could be wrong.
The third book is “Blink” by Malcolm Gladwell. It is a book about how the brain works particularly in regards to the snap decisions people make which are often more accurate than ones made with greater stress and strain. One corollary of Mr. Gladwell’s thesis is these accurate blink decisions are made by people with a large knowledge base in the matter at hand. Snap decisions by Dale Earnhart Jr. about how his engine are highly dependable, but asking him to invest your retirement fund may not be that bright. At the same time I’m not asking Alan Greenspan to diagnose my minivan’s odd noises.
The last book is “A Whole New Mind” by Daniel Pink. This is another book exploring brain science. Mr. Pink spends the first few chapters discussing the difference between the right and left hemispheres of the human brain. The right brain is more holistic and intuitive. It helps people read the context of their surroundings and the communication with others. He explains the skills surrounding inventiveness, empathy, creating narratives, and play come from the right hemisphere.
I get all the science. He then goes on to say all these skills are going to be highly valued in all professions. This is where I have to call baloney. I have very specific memory of the main stream media telling me back in 1982 that liberal arts degrees were going to be in high demand. Liberal arts degrees work the same skills that are right brain skills. Well, I got a liberal arts degree and then worked as an assistant manager at a book store and then as an assistant manager at a video store and then as an assistant manager at a book/video store. Can I sue Newsweek?
Now Mr. Pink is telling me all my right brain skills are in high demand as civilization evolves. People have all of the “got-to-haves” and most of the “want-to-haves” so now they will value things which give them more spiritual fulfillment. Doctors cannot just be good diagnosticians they must have empathy. Products cannot just fill their function they must do it while also giving the consumer an emotional charge. This explains why toothbrushes are redesigned every few months. We could brush our teeth with leaves on a stick. We just want something cooler. There are even racing stripes in some toothpastes.
One thing Mr. Pink pointed out that I grasped on to is the best leaders in organizations are funny. This was a study done by a Ph.D. guy from Harvard. Not some schmoe from some directional school in outer Slobovia. We’re talking Harvard here. Therefore, I will be sending a knee-slapping resume to Microsoft. I’m gonna get me some of that Bill Gates money before it runs out.